Stretching is the best exercise


When my knee suddenly went on its rapid aging program and ended up going from early twenties to late two hundreds in a matter of weeks, I started doing some stretches in a false belief that I could reverse its aging process. Rather, on the false guidance that it would make my knee young again.

Regardless of still having an old man knee, the stretching was nice. But still it faded out of my daily routine. The past two weeks I’ve been into it again and it is dope. Being able to touch your toes without having it nearly kill you means extra gnar grabs in two months when snowboarding season rolls around.

Snowboarding would be the second best exercise.


  1. cr 20060910

    Rapid aging programs will be the death of us all. Two weeks ago I was leaving a meeting and I must have stepped into a temporal vortex that opened on the floor right in the area where I was about to step because my left foot pretty much folded over onto itself as I placed my weight on it, thus aging it by at least 80 years instantly. It has still not entirely returned to normal.

    I’m going to need to find anti-temporal vortex shoes with some kind of alarm system to avoid that kind of quick aging in the future.

  2. puddingcups 20060911

    hehehe this is the best post i’ve read from you!! it kills me. i agree… i CAN’T touch my ankles even!.. man i’m getting old, and the funny part is that i was in ballet for almost six years! don’t laugh at me!! figure that one out. but i go in and out of the “keep myself young” program too. it does honestly feel good to stretch but then i always end up ditching it too (in about one day to two weeks). the only way you can all cure yourselves of your multiplying aging disease is to figure out how to suck the life outta children and claim it for yourself…wait there’s gotta be an easier way… wait… nope suck the life outta them. ps- i found an email where you “swore” you were going to quit snowboarding… i told you it wasn’t as cool as the old skateboard *360 boneless panther… 360 BONELESS* or since you’re getting old i’ll even take a 180.

  3. waytoocrowded 20060911

    cr: Rumor has it magic shoes protect from vortexes.

    puddingcups: Emails are just lies. You really need to delete them. How about a no-spin boneless?

  4. country 20060911

    i couldnt disagree more. I only need to think back to jason bucki’s pre-skate stretch-sessions to be reminded of my intense dislike for the unholy ritual. another memory of warm-up-stretches at the beginning of every single goddamned gym class i attended floods back and almost causes me to lose it. no, the stretch is not only uneccessary but unattractive as well. and queer as well. god i feel ill and need to lie down.

  5. puddingcups 20060912

    yeah.. like country gets ill from stretches i get ill from no spin bonelesses. are you outta your mind?!!!! just because you’re getting old doesn’t mean you can get away with everything… just because you tell me what to do because you’re OLDER doesn’t mean i can’t tell you what to do. emails are good for blackmail and the more spins you toss into a boneless the cooler you are… and that my friend is, how would YOU put it?… ah yes.. “rather rad”.

  6. country 20060912

    i mustve missed it?

  7. jb 20060913

    stretching is good when necessary (getting old/shitty) and bonelesses should never be done in 1/2 spin variations. except on tranny, in which case they should never be done in full rotations.

  8. puddingcups 20060913

    you missed nothin’ back at the good ole skatepark… my favorite trick is 360 boneless…. black panther was the only one where i would say “360 boneless” and he would break it out in the owl twilight hours. the sweetest moves busted out then…. taken the kids for stitches and such… no one here does that shit. balls.

Skateboards and bikes are better at nights

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